2014 Hate List

Good morning, friends. I assume you're all reading from home because you've taken a personal day to celebrate the arrival, at long last, of Juan-uary. Or perhaps you're home because of record snowfalls and death-defying temperatures. Sadly, we got almost no snow in tropical Lexington, and while the low temperature is predicted to be a balmy -3 degrees, by the time you read this, I will be at work because I have to go to court in the morning and unfortunately the courts are not closed in honor of this cold, cold holiday.

I hate it when other people get snow days and I don't. In fact, I've been feeling so much hate watching the Snow-Go Report that I've decided to start a new regular feature here on the tudor house blog: the 2014 Hate List. I know most people (including myself) have resolved to be nicer, kinder, gentler, and more positive in the year 2014. However, I think we can all understand that there are just some things that you hate no matter how positive you otherwise are. So without further ado, I present to you: my 2014 Hate List! I will be adding something I hate at least weekly, or as often as I find myself hating something. Last week's entry was, of course, hedgehogs. This week I add two: cold temps without snow days and eating and being healthy.

2014 Hate List

by Allison Buckley

1. Hedgehogs.

2. Cold temperatures without snow days. See above. It ain't right.

3. Eating and Being Healthy. This was another of my New Years Resolutions this year, and even though I know it's good for you, I really hate it. I made cabbage soup last week in an attempt to eat healthier, and it was gross. I added chicken to it so that I could think of it as a real meal, and it was still gross. Then I had tons of leftover chicken so I made chicken salad for dinner the next night. The salad was better, but still not quite as tasty as a delicious pizza or a Cinnabon. Scientists, please quit looking into rockets, spaceships and delivery drones and focus your attentions on a pizza that tastes just like real pizza but is actually made of carrots and green beans. And while you're at it, a puppy that always looks like a puppy but has the maturity of a full-grown dog. Is that too much to ask?

And then I made the mistake of going to my first ever Pilates class! I hated this too! First, my yoga mat has been rolled up in the basement so long that it spent the whole class rolling up and hitting me on the head whenever I tried to lay down. Then, the class was supposed to be only one hour, but I'm pretty sure it was about 5 hours long. And, it was so hard! The pictures of people on Pilates DVDs are quite misleading - they look so cool and calm and collected, but they don't tell you that your legs will be spasming uncontrollably by the end of an hour of trying to hold them in the air at hip height. But I will go back next week ... ugh!

As much as all of this is true, don't worry too much about me, loyal readers. I fully plan to order several pizzas and make a giant bowl of popcorn to celebrate the return of Juan Pablo tonight...and if all my co-watchers are unable to attend because of bad weather, I guess I'll just have to eat all of it myself.